All or Nothing: Do You Fall Into This Trap Mindset? How to Get Out of It.

Recently I got to speak about all things health, wellness and lifestyle for a group of people looking to make some progress in their fitness this year. One of the prevailing hurdles that many in the group faced was the "all or nothing" mentality.

From my almost 15 years of experience the "all or nothing" mentality stems from a few things.

1. Black and White Thinking: This is a sort of cognitive bias that fails to notice the middle ground and instead opts for extremes. For example, if you can't exercise everyday then its not worth exercising at all.

2. Perfectionist: These people set their standards high, which isn't inherently bad, but they often don't understand the nuances of health and fitness and therefore set unrealistic expectations. Failure to meet them is internalized as failure as a human.

3. Instant Gratification: In our high tech culture, instant gratification is often what our brains crave to keep going. If we don't see results quickly then the motivation to continue dwindles and people are more prone to quitting altogether.

There are also more practical reasons as well.

Time Management: Modern life is busy, and many people feel they can only dedicate time to fitness if they can go all in. Hence, they might decide to either commit fully or not at all due to perceived time constraints.

Overwhelm: The large amount of information and options available in fitness can be overwhelming, leading to paralysis by analysis. Choosing an all-or-nothing approach can simplify decisions, but can be damaging long-term.

Lack of Education: Without understanding what sustainable health and fitness look like, people might not recognize the value in moderation or consistency over intensity.

The goal so far is give you awareness. Awareness on where YOU might be functioning from.

Next lets discuss how you actually move away from this style of thinking and some actionable tips to move forward.

1. Recognize and Acknowledge the Pattern
First, become aware that you're engaging in all-or-nothing thinking. Look for phrases in your thoughts like "always," "never," "perfect," or "failure."

Keep a journal or use an app to note when you catch yourself in this mindset. Over time, you'll see patterns and triggers. Remember, awareness is key.

2. Challenge Black-and-White Thoughts
When you catch an extreme thought, challenge it. Ask yourself questions like:
-Is there really no middle ground here?
-What would a more balanced view look like?
-Are there any examples where I've been successful even if I haven't been perfect?

Look for evidence that contradicts your all-or-nothing view. For instance, if you think you've "failed" at dieting because you ate one unhealthy meal, remind yourself of all the healthy meals you've had recently. Remember, what you focus on grows, so shift your focus on to what you are doing well.

3. Embrace the Gray Areas
Instead of looking at everything as a success or failure, think in terms of scales or spectrums.

Rate your efforts or progress on a scale of 1-10 rather than deeming them a complete success or failure.

Break down your goals into smaller, more manageable steps that allow for progress without perfection. For example, have goal for the year and then break that down into quarterly goals, monthly goals, weekly goals and then daily objectives.

4. Seek Support
Working with a coach, therapist, or trainer can help you identify limiting beliefs, blocks and areas where you may be setting unrealistic goals or partaking in self-sabotaging, all or nothing behavior.

Remember: Don't be too hard on yourself in the process. Its all a learning experience and the goal is to get better, not be perfect.

Hope this was useful today.

Enjoy the week!

PS. Know anybody who benefit from reading this? Please forward this to them so we can help them together.