Overcoming Limiting Beliefs for Lasting Change
If you've been following this newsletter or my content on social media (links at the bottom to follow ) then you know how much I believe our thoughts, feelings, beliefs have SO much to do with our physical health, sticking to a diet, exercising regularly.
Most people never make real change in their health (4% success rate).
A major reason is that people are dieting and exercising without any real awareness as to why they got unhealthy to begin with.
Sure, you aren't eating well or exercising...but why? No its not that you don't have time or "life happened."
Those are excuses and we discussed that last week.
But this week we are diving more into your pain and hardship and how that is holding you back.
You have a unconscious story that keeps you stuck. This is the thing you work on. Getting unstuck.
Only then can diet and training be effective.
I recently came across a study that seems to agree. You can read the whole study HERE
But here's a quote summarizing its findings and a highlighted aspect I want to cover more.
-Chronic caregiving stress may accelerate biological aging; however, the ability to integrate the meaning of caregiving through self-awareness, adaptation, and growth can buffer the negative effects of stress. Narrative researchers have shown that people who coherently integrate difficult experiences into their life story tend to have better mental health, but no prior study has examined the prospective association between narrative identity and biological indicators, such as telomere length. We tested whether narrative identity might be prospectively associated with resilience to long-term parenting stress, depressive symptoms, and protection from telomere shortening, especially among caregivers.-
The reason this is important is because it validates what we think to be true.
You can make the stressful moments, stories in your life mean something powerful and fulfilling going forward. You can turn your pain into purpose. You can turn it into something good!
The event itself isn't bad if you make it mean something good.
This is where the personal development, awareness aspect of living a healthy life come into play.
You see a million diets, training plans, hacks, habits, etc all over the place. Hell, I share some of them too. They are a piece of the puzzle.
But they are a small piece if you can't overcome your limiting beliefs and stressors that keep you from being able to do these things.
This is why I have dedicated my career to helping you understand your triggers and stories (more than just diet and training) so that you are not a victim to them. You can overcome them and live a healthy and happy life.
Today we want to challenge your beliefs in 2 ways.
1. Identify Limiting Beliefs.
There are a few types of limiting beliefs to bring awareness to.
-Limiting Beliefs About the World. You believe certain things to be true in the world that just don't serve you.
Examples being lack of time in a day, true love doesn't exist, there are no good paying jobs, the food is all poisoned because of big pharma, etc.
Overcoming this is some of the hardest work you'll ever do because it was probably learned from the people you love or admire the most.
-Limiting Beliefs About Other People: You believe your actions matter more than they do to other people. You care too much about what other people think of you and your actions. The belief that others will be disappointed in our actions. I did a previous blog on the spotlight effect which dives deeper into this.
Example being " I don't want to do FILL IN THE BLANK because so and so will think this or that."
-Limiting Beliefs About Yourself: These are where YOU believe you are dumb, too old, stupid, etc. The truth is these are simply stories you've decided to believe and that's the only thing that makes them so. For ANY example you come up with to combat this view point, there is somebody who has proven that inaccurate.
You aren't too old to start over, people in there 80s embark on new careers and families all the time.
-Entitled Beliefs: Yep, limiting beliefs can also mean that somehow the world owes you and that things belong to you. The idea that people "don't get you" and that they are at fault, is often a limiting belief to keep you from overcoming your own shit and growing.
2. Change Self-Talk.
Your limiting beliefs can sometimes occur deep in your subconscious, but more often than not, it is negative self-talk that’s telling you why you can’t, don’t want to or must not do something. Self-talk is constant, and the more we tell ourselves something, the more we believe it.
There is a saying; "what we focus on grows, what we focus on seems real, what we focus on ultimately we become."
Humans have thousands of thoughts per day – perhaps even tens of thousands – and if even a small amount of those involve limiting beliefs, that’s a constant negative narrative running through your head.
Overcoming limiting beliefs starts with noticing the way your “inner voice” speaks to you. When you fail or give up on a task, what does it say? When you are getting ready to start a new fitness program, what does it say?
I often talk to new prospective clients about working together. Sometimes they choose a different coach and tell me 'if it doesn't work out I will be back in touch."
I say to them, "that's ok this just isn't a good fit."
They've already put the limiting belief in their head that the process they've chosen will likely not work out. If you are planning on it working, why would you reach back out to me? This self talk kills them before they've even started, worst of all they are not even aware of it.
Conclusion
To overcome all of these you need to be your own constant reminder of how your thoughts and beliefs are keeping you stuck.
Challenge yourself.
Make your hardships and struggles mean something.
Ask yourself, "Even if this were true, how could I do it anyway?"
This gives your brain and subconscious a whole new path to search for solutions.
If this resonates with you I'd love to hear from you.
